Melbourne’s backyard is basically a choose-your-own-campfire, so pick a direction and go. For coastal drama, the Great Ocean Road delivers from Anglesea to Johanna, roughly 100–220 km away, with surf that’ll rattle your billy. If you prefer granite and emus, the Grampians (around 260 km west) hands you starry skies and calves that complain all Monday. Wilsons Prom is 220 km south-east and still the poster child—Tidal River books out fast because, frankly, everyone wants it. Closer in, Cathedral Range (about 120 km north-east) and Lake Eildon (140–180 km) serve up rugged trails and water views without the pretence. For easy wins, hit the Mornington Peninsula or Wombat State Forest (70–100 km) and be back in time to pretend you’ve done the washing.

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